The main response to an abortion is that it doesn't affect the person who has undergone the procedure, or the people who have carried out the procedure, or encouraged it in the first place. Denial that anything wrong (ie the killing of an innocent child) can take place, is about to take place, is taking place or has taken place is the main coping mechanism that occurs in the minds of all those involved, whether directly or indirectly. The mother seeking the abortion; the husband, boyfriend, partner, parent, friend, counsellor or GP who suggests the abortion; those in the medical profession who arrange, carry out the tests, carry out the procedure and work on the wards; and even those who have to clear away after the procedure. All these people have to convince themselves that the killing of a child by abortion is not wrong.
Then there are those who deny that it is a baby but may say it is a potential person instead of acknowledging s/he is a person with potential who, given the opportunity would be able to develop in all respects of life. These people often label themselves as 'pro-choice'. It would be interesting to know at what point they considered themselves to be a human person. They actively support and promote abortion and in the majority of cases, say that it should be available to any women or girl no matter the age, as a worldwide right so that she can decide what she does with her body. They completely deny the fact that the baby is a separate person, even if it is a boy and so definitely cannot be a part of the mother's body to do as she wishes. Their denial of the baby's existence as a newly created developing human being is completely explained away by saying that it is a blob of cells, a parasite, not yet alive, not viable, without rights and in some cases an unborn baby has even been described as a growth inside a woman that has to be removed similar to a cancerous tumour.
Then there are those who just choose to deny what is happening. The silent majority. They either choose not to think about abortion because it would be too depressing, or too sad, or too horrendous. They prefer to stay ignorant of the facts as it is easier for them that way. They just want to get on with their own lives and not have to face the issue of over 500 babies being killed each day in the UK, encouraged by their own GP, carried out in their hospitals or a 'charitable' clinic, funded by their taxes, performed on their neighbours or friends. Until it affects them personally, they choose to deny it is happening. And while the mothers who are killing their babies through abortion continue to remain silent, as they think they must, then society will continue to deny and ignore their pain.
Throughout the world people have been remembering the genocide of Rwanda and asking themselves if there was anything they could have done instead of just allowing the killing to happen. The influential Western nations, whether as individual nations such as the USA or Great Britain, or collectively such as the UN or the EU go to war in foreign countries where they see or perceive violation of human rights or ethnic cleansing and call themselves 'civilised', yet these same nations are those who promote the killing by abortion of their own nations' heritage. Not only do they deny the killing of babies in their own lands, but export and promote abortion wherever they can.
Denial is the unseen force that allows the killing of thousands of babies a day worldwide to continue, whilst still calling ourselves civilised and holding ourselves in high esteem as though we cannot do anything wrong. In Luke 6 v 42 Jesus said "How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,' when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Strong words but truthful nevertheless.
Abortion, whilst readily available and swiftly performed, leaves in its wake a deadened society. Mothers are too ashamed to admit or talk about their actions. Fathers either had no say in the decision even if they disagreed with the action, or would have encouraged it. Parents of schoolgirls may not have found out until too late if at all, and then would not have been able to stop the killing of their grandchild. GPs, Social Workers, Counsellors all hide behind the confidentiality laws and insist that the girl/woman made the decision herself. Should-have-been siblings wonder why their mother has suddenly changed character. Compassionate friends will not talk about the decision for fear of being seen to be judgemental.
For some women, denial still exists even if they have been through post abortion counselling and think they have been 'healed' or are 'over it'. Sadly, this is not the case. This is particularly the case in many churches. They would say that they have been forgiven and now they have put it behind them. They are free to get on with their own lives and need not mention it again. BUT, if they are not telling others of the horror of killing their own child, of the pain it subsequently caused them and those around them, and the need for abortion to stop so that other women do not go through what they have been through, then sadly, they are still in denial. They are still ashamed of their own actions. They are still seeking the approval of society that will not allow them to admit they did wrong. They are possibly even believing that what they did was right at the time and they had no other choice.
Satan is the father of lies and it is still the lies of the devil that are holding these women, and those around her who go along with her charade of 'healing', captive. Denial is not easily broken.
Some people say that abortion is the lesser of two evils, yet in Matthew 5 (the Sermon on the Mount) Jesus said "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfil them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished. Anyone who breaks one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will certainly not enter the kingdom of heaven. "You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca, ' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell." Should we really believe then, that Jesus would accept our excuse for abortion as 'the lesser of two evils'?
Unless we can break the cycle of denial and begin to talk about our true feelings, history will just repeat itself and the killing of our children and the unspoken pain of their mothers will just continue to be denied. If we really want to be a caring society then the denial must be broken and the truth, no matter how painful, must be spoken loud and clear. Once the denial is broken - then what?
Then we begin to see a greater emergence of the guilt, anger and grief that has probably been occurring in many cases, but without a recognised reason for these re-actions and the extreme behaviour in the life of the hurting person.
Please visit our Healing page if you have had an abortion or supported someone who has.
If you have had an abortion and would like to contact us, in confidence,
Grace at United for Life.